[Channel 3000] MADISON, Wis. - A 25-year-old Madison man was arrested after demanding that a man on a bicycle pay him a fine for riding a bike on a sidewalk, according to police.
Police said Michael P. Moran, 25, was intoxicated when he stopped the bicyclist in the 300 block of West Wilson Street Thursday night. Moran said he was acting as a law enforcement officer and demanded the bicyclist pay a $200 fine for biking on the sidewalk, according to police.
The victim said he knew it was legal to ride his bike on residential sidewalks and he called police.
Police said Moran was found asleep in some bushes near the crime scene.
Moran was arrested on suspicion of impersonating a peace officer and for possession of a switchblade knife.
I can’t knock this drunk guy’s hustle. I just can’t. Yeah it’s illegal to impersonate a police officer. Yeah you shouldn’t be getting so drunk you pass out in a bush. I know that. But you know what else you shouldn’t be doing? Riding your bike on the fucking sidewalk. I don’t care if it’s legal. Nope. Don’t care one bit. This is one of those moments where you have to Batman that shit and take the law into your own hands.
If murder was legal you’d still try and stop someone from killing you, right? Same exact thing here. Same exact thing. If riding your bike on the sidewalk is legal, that just means that the lawmakers aren’t doing their jobs. It means the police aren’t doing their jobs. And when that happens, our entire society starts to break down.
Well Michael Moran isn’t going to stand for that. You think Michael Moran wants our entire civilization to crumble into a dystopian wasteland where murderers roam the streets and bicyclists are allowed to bike on the sidewalk? Fuck no. Michael Moran is a patriot. Michael Moran is a humanitarian. Michael Moran is the hero Wisconsin needs right now.Follow @footstepsfaIco